[Ryder lifts her hands, seems to realize that she doesn't have words to talk with so her hands shouldn't talk either, puts them down, then raises them again in exasperation before turning around to look at Teo. Or, more accurately, at a little wrinkle in his gaiter. Nice and safe, this little wrinkle.]
I'm just -- going to pretend I'm not talking to you! [She might be able to get words out better that way. ...Doubtful, since it's still her dumbass brain stringing the words together and she's still wound the fuck up. But: not talking to Maddy. Already this is an improvement.] S-so we've got -- these sisters, and one of 'em is either gonna -- die because zombies because her heart -- i'nt in it, or because Daddy said so after seeing -- her heart not being in it.
And then the other's trying to get rid of her so she doesn't have to get rid of her because she's -- the one that matters. Wants to protect her. From her dad. Only, if he sees that -- wouldn't he just fucking kill 'em both? Because then sh-she's more than the mission, to the one that kills people with stuff more than -- than the mission.
And if that is the case, then they can live and be miserable until they -- die, or they can leave and live until they die. Or maybe they can -- just live.
[If she's still alive and getting to dip her toe into what living is like again thanks to Teo, a certified miracle, the wonder before her eyes, the most anomaliest of anomalies, then couldn't it be possible for things to work out for someone actually suited for staying alive in this world, too?]
I'm n-not good at math, so, like. But fuck the odds -- right?! You gotta try, even if -- it looks stupid. What can you do after a-aaall of it, otherwise? If the world gets better and you can't -- enjoy it, then that sucks! You wanna live with your sister, so do it. Try. I got pushed down a hallway in a laundry cart yesterday, for fuck's s-sake! How fucking dumb and-and-and fun is that? I like living with -- Teo, and that's -- that's better than it was. Even if tonight I died because of your psycho dad being fucking psycho, or whatever.
no subject
I'm just -- going to pretend I'm not talking to you! [She might be able to get words out better that way. ...Doubtful, since it's still her dumbass brain stringing the words together and she's still wound the fuck up. But: not talking to Maddy. Already this is an improvement.] S-so we've got -- these sisters, and one of 'em is either gonna -- die because zombies because her heart -- i'nt in it, or because Daddy said so after seeing -- her heart not being in it.
And then the other's trying to get rid of her so she doesn't have to get rid of her because she's -- the one that matters. Wants to protect her. From her dad. Only, if he sees that -- wouldn't he just fucking kill 'em both? Because then sh-she's more than the mission, to the one that kills people with stuff more than -- than the mission.
And if that is the case, then they can live and be miserable until they -- die, or they can leave and live until they die. Or maybe they can -- just live.
[If she's still alive and getting to dip her toe into what living is like again thanks to Teo, a certified miracle, the wonder before her eyes, the most anomaliest of anomalies, then couldn't it be possible for things to work out for someone actually suited for staying alive in this world, too?]
I'm n-not good at math, so, like. But fuck the odds -- right?! You gotta try, even if -- it looks stupid. What can you do after a-aaall of it, otherwise? If the world gets better and you can't -- enjoy it, then that sucks! You wanna live with your sister, so do it. Try. I got pushed down a hallway in a laundry cart yesterday, for fuck's s-sake! How fucking dumb and-and-and fun is that? I like living with -- Teo, and that's -- that's better than it was. Even if tonight I died because of your psycho dad being fucking psycho, or whatever.