everything is going to be okay

[storywalks]

are you waiting for something,
or did something find you already?

Comments

[honestgirl]

[She doesn't know that she's mirroring anyone -- in truth, it's probably become a common story. Someone scared and bleeding, finding somewhere to hide away like their life depends on it. Like their life isn't already over, and it doesn't matter if you manage to catch your breath or not. She pushes something in front of the shed door -- some random boards, she thinks -- before stumbling backwards and sinking down.

Ryder's always found comfort in smaller spaces like this. There were years she would crawl into her closet when overwhelmed or even just to curl up with a book and a flashlight, enjoying the way it muffled the life around her and let her immerse herself in fantastical adventures or spooky mysteries. There's nothing about this junkheap that can help her now. Maybe if she couldn't hear the approaching, hungry growls or the thuds and scratches against the walls, she'd feel her heart slow and get her sobs under control. Instead, she has to know that all she's doing is drawing more of them to her and losing blood from where her last two fingers used to be.]

Fuck. Fucking shit. God, fucking shit.

[She's going to die. She's already dead. There was no coming back from this, even if she managed to amputate her hand and leg on her own or suck from the wounds like they were snake bites and she could get the venom out. That doesn't even work, does it? It doesn't matter. None of it matters -- everything she's learned, been through, dreamed about...]

Mom...!

[It isn't pathetic, she thinks, to cry for her mommy right now. She needs the one that's always made things better when they seemed so hopeless, and who supported her unflinchingly through good times and bad, even if it meant that things were going to be harder. Ryder has more faith she would show up than some divine being to soothe her in these final moments, even if she invokes the name of one like the heathen she is. God, how long would this take? Her hands won’t stop shaking. When…are they going to stop shaking?]